Tag Archives: yoga teacher

I lost my map!

Park City, Utah

Jan 7, 2019 was the day I officially started yoga again after a long winter break/holiday. I know that actually is a bit late to the whole “New Years Resolution” program. But I had zero resolutions I was clear on making…mostly because I was distracted trying to survive skiing for the first time (which is utterly terrifying). So through the hysteria of falling down a mountain every 5 feet trying not to die by veering out of control over the cliff, a resolution was not made- just a resolve to survive the next turn. Perhaps a metaphor eh?
Coming home to LA, albeit relieved, I was in a lull I had not experienced for sometime. My yoga clients are still traveling and my schedule has been hard to fill. I also have this new book out and suddenly I am not sure what I anticipated by having a book published? Wild success? No…perhaps eventually (sigh). I know better than that…but still, no real map on the next step of what that entails. Let me be more specific, no real budget.
No  budget, no clients, no income, no hope. I’ve sat in my apartment since last week wondering if I had some how become agoraphobic and a recluse? Suddenly noise seemed noisier and crowds more crowded. Does anyone else hear that high pitch ringing? I just wanted to stay home with myself. Avoiding yoga avoiding everyone.
I went on one job interview (that did not go well) and that some how sent me back to a level of hurt form being rejected that I had endured in the 11 years of LA.  I’m just kind of tired of beginning again. This time I’m trying to be a nanny! So many years of composing music, then teaching yoga, now writing a children’s book… I don’t know how to answer the question anymore when someone asks “What do you do?”  uh…
The deep dive into depression I go! But at least I am used to this swim. I stroke familiarly agains the tides and hold my breath for even longer. Silently praying (screaming) in my head “NO! NO! NO!”   I cannot be here! I cannot! I have fought too hard, developed too many skills! Yet to be this uncertain and this terrified for my future? Crippling anxiety takes hold, the worst thought ever arises- was this all a mistake?


None the less, I know when I am in this mindset, there’s one thing I’m avoiding most. Going to yoga. So today out of the depths of my despair and self pity I rose (late of course).  Just so I could yell at myself all day for being late…and made it to yoga. 
The class was fantastic. Just what I needed. My 5 pound…ok, 10 pound heavier Christmas body was strong, flexible and the fluidity was returning and…ah…sigh… my mind was calming. 

I had the realization that my mind was a crumpled ball of paper. How could I write any intention on it? At the end of practice though, it returned to a smooth white paper, ready for me to act upon it. A clear list of intentions of actions were ready to be written. I knew I had lost my map, but at least I found my way back to my mat. That’s all I can do for now. Uncrumple Kailand.

Yoga Sequencing: Building towards the Peak Pose

When I first began yoga, for many years (yes years) I had no idea there was a rhyme or reason to the practice. It was because I was totally out of my depth and element. The teachers would say things in sanskrit, I was battling a mindful of distracting thoughts and at some point I usually just prayed we would get to the “laying down” part at the end ( I LOVE that part, perhaps more than most).

However, there was one thing I did extraordinarily right. There was one thing I achieved in yoga that most people never have or will.  And that was my attitude.  I have the best attitude when it comes to yoga. My attitude was, and always will be, zero expectations.  I do not wander into yoga demanding anything from it that day.  I don’t care about seeing results, I don’t over analyze what I can and cannot do. I do not hold any hope or expectations  for my teachers. Just carry simple gratitude that they are there to maybe show me just one thing I didn’t know about myself or about yoga before that day. This humility provided me a limilitess enjoyment and engagement with the experience and still provides me the same wonder and awe today.

So as I ventured on to my mat, in this realm of an unknown experience I tried to make sense of it all.  As I got into my certification and training I realized that practice wasn’t just some random poses strung together said by a teacher in half english. There actually was a course to navigate and a linear path.  Each pose helps lead to the next.

In my previous blog I broke down the warm up. Here I will explain what happens after you’ve dropped in and begin to flow.

Sequencing in yoga is a strategy that is implemented to help take all the component parts offered in warm up, to guide you consciously and subconcsioculy towards a peak position.  So basically 1/3 of the way through you’ve already built this pose bit by bit and towards the apex you put it all together.  So it’s not just chaos! It’s a systemic approach.

Hence why there should be zero expectations at the beginning of your journey. Do the work and all will come together.  No matter the time. So an example of a peak position (which could be anything, which is why the practice is so limitless and exciting) let’s choose Handstand.  A good way to sequence a practice around handstand is to break down what exactly is required for this pose.

07/18/2015 Kyle Lardner Beach Shots

Shoulder strength

Fearlessness to go upside down

Balance

Flexibility

With these  component elements in place, there are tangible parts of your warm up which have already started incorporating these parts. For example during warming up, downward dog is a wonderful way to build shoulder strength. In addition you are already going halfway upside down (since you are raising your hips above your head). The mind is already experiencing in a very safe way, life upside down.

downward_facing_dog_ink

 

The Surya A’s and B’s (as mentioned in my warm up blog) are also wonderful series that work nearly every muscle group as well as start incorporating balancing and flexibility.

surya-namaskar-a-1

So even if you don’t put it all together for the peak pose, eventually after repetition and practice, you will have already done everything it takes to take it a step further and begin raising your legs up over your head for handstand.  I’ve noticed in practice that eventually poses reveal themselves to you, through proper breathing, practice and instruction from the teacher.  Which is why having no expectation is the best way to approach yoga.

After one has achieved the peak position, the practice then typically shifts towards cooling down.  We cultivate a lot of heat and energy working towards this goal. In my next blog I’ll go through the details of the cool down.

This is a typical break down for a beginner and intermediate yoga class.

Let your work be the expression of your commitment and all will come. Or as I like to say “Do the work and all will calm.”

 

 

Tips from the Top: David Lynch (Part I)

I’ve been really excited to write this particular article featuring David Lynch. His classes are popular because his method works. He immediately takes one into the present moment. Few people possess such divine humility. Although he has ethereal abilities it’s his moments of reality and referencing pop culture that adds a perfect comedic release during the apex of the practice. He has an exceptional play list and command of the room.  As well as angelic presence. He is a very special kind of  teacher. A spirit guide.

I was so happy when he responded to my weekly column with not only enthusiasm but a books worth of guidance.  So much so I had to I’ve decided to break his answers in to parts.  (I know readers are short on time). He is such a vast source of knowledge and depth it is incredible.  All of these teachers are and it has been so humbling having them open up and respond to the weekly question:

What is your advice for beginning Yogis?

david-lynch1

Be strong enough to shed your preconceptions and step onto your mat each day, out into this world and into your own head with a nakedness born of mature innocence, a willingness to be present to the true nature of the immediacy of the moment and if you can, freed from the fetters of your past triumphs and traumas and unburdened by the unknowable unknown you will live in fluctuating moments of serenity that one day will bloom into tranquil permanent impermanence.
– David Lynch